Update may 06/20
It has been three years since I wrote this and in my opinion the question still remains the same. Parkinson’s has not robbed me of who and what I am. Granted it has made things more challenging but I believe I am actually a better person because of it.
So again I must ask, please don’t present to me details about Parkinson’s that will make me fear it. Present it in a manner that makes me know that I can live a positive life with what ever it places in front of me.
Thanks for all who help in this endeavor.
What comes first the chicken or the egg?
I am a 62 year old man with Parkinson,s since 2012.
Am I experiencing symptoms because of a progression of my disease or am I experiencing these symptoms because I am constantly reading about them?
I am starting to get depressed , not from the Parkinson’s but from everybody telling me what and how I might experience it?
So I have to ask myself ”What comes first the chicken or the egg?”
Trying to find out information about the disease is frustrating me. Not that information is not out there but in the manner that it is presented to me. So again I must ask myself “Are my symptoms from Parkinson’s or by chance are some of them just happening to me by the aging process? “ After all I am not getting any younger you know?
The below statement appeared in this months E-Parkinson’s post
Parkinson’s is so much more than having a shake or tremor or even so much more than a shuffling gait. Parkinson’s robs you of the person that you are and the person that you could have been. Every day you notice new things: numbness in the left foot, more dystonia, leg cramps and spasms. Painful to say the least. You may notice your eyes are blurry. You have dreams so vivid you sometimes act them out by kicking, screaming, pushing or jumping out of bed in fear that you are being chased by wolves or snakes, etc. You may have trouble with constipation, or trouble completely emptying your bladder, or experience frequency or sudden incontinence. Some other symptoms you may experience are depression, anxiety, lack of concentration, onset of Dementia, small cramped handwriting (micrographia), lack of facial expression, the list goes on and on. The person you had planned to be when you retired is no longer there. Instead there is this person who has to function on a three-hour medication schedule with slowdown periods half an hour before your next pill time, and then another half-hour wait until you are at your maximum level again. You feel like a little old lady with increased poor posture and your neck protruding several inches before the rest of you. It isn’t easy, but then neither is any disease. You feel embarrassment when you meet someone you haven’t seen in a while. They really notice a decline in your health. You want to scream out: “I don’t need your pity. I don’t want your sympathy. I am still alive here in this body.” Although it may seem my body is playing a horrible trick on me, this is still me! I am only 62 years old. I have at least a quarter of my life time to live out yet.
I am experiencing most , if not all of, the above symptoms, however…
Parkinson’s did not, has not, robbed me of the person that I am!
It has not stopped me from planing what I could be doing.
Yes it has changed things!
Yes I have to devise a detailed plan of attack to do these things and Yes, I might even have to plan on how to recover from doing these things.
But how am I to know that just being older and aging would not have made me do the same?
Don’t make me fearful of what may be coming my way, enlighten me on how I can adapt to continue doing the things I am able to enjoy.